The one where I'm annoyed at the world

Let me go ahead and preface this post with: I am not a morning person. I am definitely not a morning person at 8:00 AM on a Saturday. Most things, like other people breathing, annoy me at that time of day.

With that said, I was in my anatomy and physiology class on Saturday at 8:00 AM. I sat in the same place I sat in last week, and Mr. and Mrs. Tweedledum also sat right behind me, just like last week. The best I can figure is that these two are married, but I haven't really asked, and I don't care a lot, except who the hell gets married and then takes college classes together? At the age of 40+? And why do they have to sit behind me?

First off, they chatter the whole time. It's not very loud, but I want to turn around and tell them to shut it. No one thinks it's cute that they're furthering their college degree together. It's kind of creepy and weird, and who the hell's keeping the kids?

At the beginning of class, Mr. Tweedledum likes to whip out his Macbook. Fine. Except this is community college and he's the only moron taking notes on a laptop. And then he talks about his laptop THE ENTIRE CLASS. "I don't know if I'll need to take notes with a computer..." "I don't know which program to use..." Look. The class isn't even two hours. If you can't take notes for that long, you should drop out now.

Apparently having a laptop makes one feel very, very smart too, because they both like to answer all the questions the instructor throws out. Not loud enough for the instructor to hear, just loud enough for their own satisfaction, and as it turns out, mine. But here's the thing. They're not always right. And then Mr. or Mrs. Tweedledum kind of clears his/her throat and says, "Oh, erm...heh heh." And then I kind of have to choke back all sorts of evil cackling.

Also super annoying at 8 in the morning on a Saturday...crunching. I don't know what was going on back there, because I was afraid to turn around and look lest I screamed multiple profanities, but Mr. Tweedledum had a whole bag of hard candies or a full cup of ice because he WOULD NOT STOP CRUNCHING. "Metabolism? No? Oh, erm...heh heh *CRUNCH, CRUNCH*"

Also cringe-worthy and annoying was the old lady at the end of my table who video-recorded the whole class. People, it's a hard class, no doubt. It's an important class too. But for the love of all that's holy, it's not rocket science.

I'm not going to make it.

Listy McListerson

1. I'm still here. Barely.

2. I had to drop my math class because when I went to double check the ASN curriculum, the math I was taking no longer fulfilled the requirement. I was a little more than happy to.

3. It's hard, going back to school, three kids, blah, blah, blah. But it is and will be so beneficial to this whole family. The added income once I'm a RN will be great, but the kids watching me do this is the real bonus. I took Big D with me to drop that math class, and he was in awe and had so many questions. I answered all of them and then some. Brainwashing starts early up in this house.

4. The husband pondered which sounds better: President Obama or former President Bush. Either one makes me so giddy I could cry.

5. Something that has been making me giggle all week: When asked where something is, like a sippy cup or his blankie, Boobers points all haphazardly and says, "Dere." Also cute if not a little disconcerting: Big D and Smella playing "squirrel" where one is appointed the squirrel and the other the "keeper." Squirrel crawls around saying, "SQUEEEEEAK" while the other throws food at it. People should procreate just for that kind of shit.

I may never post again

School started Monday, and I'm already a ball of overwhelmedness. Firefox says that isn't a word, but Firefox can suck it.

If I thought I bit off more than I could chew last semester, I got a fucking wake-up call this semester. At first, twelve credit hours seemed doable. Aside from anatomy, the other three classes are really a piece of cake.

I may have been wrong.

I'm struggling with the idea of only going part-time. I think I would feel better mentally, but it's going to take forever to graduate at that pace, and I don't earn as much in grants. When I go full time, grants cover nearly all of tuition and books. If I go part-time, I'll have to take out more student loans. Student loans suck donkey balls.

I have to work at least 18-20 hours a week to maintain all of our health insurance. The husband's health insurance is way too much money. So cutting down hours there really isn't a possibility.

I've thought about giving up a kid or two, but I think the law frowns upon that.

I'm going to buckle down for a couple of weeks. Hell, I haven't even been to my anatomy and physiology class yet. Maybe it'll all fall into place and work itself out. Besides, I only have to make it until May at this pace, right?

Sure, I may have a complete mental breakdown, but I hear they give really good drugs for that.

Random Tuesday thoughts

1. My sister got a miniature dachshund named Oscar. I WANT HIM. Only I'll rename him Mr. Snugglewugglecutiesmooshieface.

2. By sheer coincidence, my friend K got a Boston terrier puppy named Oliver. I've seen a picture of him, and I WANT HIM TOO.

3. Except that on Saturday night, K's puppy broke his leg. The emergency vet charged $350 that night, and she's going to have to pay to have it re-splinted every two weeks for a couple of months. Right now, my healthy, sturdy ten-year-old cat is looking pretty good.

4. School starts back up for me next Monday. I'm going to try to go full time this semester. I'm taking anatomy and physiology I, intermediate algebra, sociology, and interpersonal communications. Books for this semester ran me $818. Do you know what I could buy with that amount of money? I'm trying not to think about it.

5. I'm doing laundry today, and I'm obsessed with fabric softener. I'll cheap out on just about everything, but I only buy expensive softener. I figure if I have to do all the laundry, I might as well treat myself to some fine smelling clothes.

6. It's been what? three weeks since we've had our Wii? I still can't beat the husband in tennis, and I can't tell you how fucking annoying it is. And he gloats. What kind of asshole gloats to his wife? This just means that I have to practice harder while he's at work. I hope he doesn't want fresh smelling underwear any time soon.

7. I have to sweep and mop the kitchen now because of my lack of crumb-snatching puppy. But dammit! $350 in x-rays and pain pills! But ohhh, velvety puppy ears and soft puppy paws and puppy breath...

An Early Morning Flight

I wrote this as a "radical revision" in my English Comp class. I radically revised the first paper I wrote for that class, which was a compilation of How I met the husband. This paper is written from my mom's perspective. Since I'm feeling lazy and worthless and thought I'd better post something on this poor blog, here you go.

***

I sat and blinked, bleary-eyed, as a sipped at my cup of coffee. It was nearly 6 o’clock on a warm Friday morning in June. The sun was already up, and I could hear my daughter in her bedroom, stuffing things into her suitcase and zipping it up. I was trying to wake up enough to drive her to the airport.

In a moment, she came down the hall, dragging her suitcase and small carry-on with her. She saw me and smiled.

“Are you awake?” she asked.

“Almost,” I replied, giving her a wan smile.

She grabbed the keys to my car and went to the garage to load up her luggage. My smile disappeared, and I stared into my dark pool of coffee. She needed to be at the airport by 6:30, and her flight was due for take-off at 7:30. I would be driving her to Indianapolis International and then seeing her off as she flew to Arkansas to stay for a week.

I wasn’t sure exactly how I felt about it, but I think “dread” was the best term to use. She had met a man over the Internet nearly five months before. I had met the husband, and I liked him immediately, but he lived almost 600 miles away. I could tell that Kelly adored him, and while I was happy for her, it also scared me to death.

“We need to go soon,” Kelly said as she came back into the house.

I nodded and finished up the rest of my coffee. She followed me as I took the empty cup to the kitchen sink.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

I nodded and fought back tears. I slipped on my shoes and held out my hand to her for my keys.

***

We were quiet during the drive to the airport, both of us listening to early morning radio. I glanced over at her and saw how young she looked, radiant and excited. She was young, too young, but she was eighteen, graduated from high school, and by all means, an adult. I wanted to tie her up in her room and never let her leave, but I knew I couldn’t do that. I knew I had to let her make this trip.

I helped her check in at the airport, and we went and found the gate she would be departing from. We found seats, and she offered to get me a cup of coffee while we waited. I handed her a couple of dollars and watched as she walked away from me.

She was happy, and in turn, I was happy for her. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that this trip, this small, seven-day trip, was the beginning to so much more. I had already thought about all of this before; she was in love with this man, he seemed to love her, they lived 600 miles apart. Not all of the math added up, and ever since Kelly had been young she had always wanted to move away and explore the country. And while I’m thinking Arkansas was never really at the top of her list, I knew her well enough to know that she had a decent reason to go there anyway.

Kelly came back with my paper cup of steaming coffee and handed it to me as she sat down. She kept glancing over at me with a worried look on her face.

“Really, are you okay?”

“Mostly,” I answered.

“You’re not acting okay.”

I sighed softly. How could I tell her? She was so happy, so excited. Why should I ruin a trip for her? How could I tell her I didn’t want her to go, not even for a week? That I was afraid that after this week long trip she would decide she wanted to stay there with him? How could I tell her it would break my heart if she left and moved away permanently?

“I’m just…sorry to see you go,” I offered.

“Oh, it’s only for a week!” she cried, smiling. “It’s not like I’m leaving forever!”

***

I knew I was worrying her by being so quiet, but I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t tell her everything I was thinking. Even though she was eighteen and fairly mature for her age, I knew she wouldn’t want me blubbering in the middle of an airport about how sad I was. I could also tell she was holding back some of her excitement for me. She was thrilled to be flying by herself for the first time, and she was excited to be seeing the husband again.

Our relationship had been a bit strained for the past year. She met the husband online a few months ago, and since then it had been a whirlwind. He had flown to Indiana to take her to her prom. She had been staying up into the wee hours of the morning to chat with him, either online or over the phone. If I questioned her, she was prone to blow up at me, using the good old standby of “You don’t understand me!” as a line of reasoning. And since our relationship was strained, she was kind of right. I had a pretty good idea of what she was feeling, but nothing was ever confirmed. I wasn’t sure what she was planning or what she was exactly thinking. All I knew was that she was in love, and kids in love can do crazy things, like moving far away from their parents.

They began announcing boarding for her flight. She stood up and grabbed her carry-on.

“Well,” she said, “I think this is it.”

I looked up at her. Eighteen-years-old, young, impressionable. My baby. I finally let the tears that had been threatening to escape flow.

“Mom! You can’t cry!”

I stood up and gave her a hug. She hugged me back fiercely.

“Can you call me when you get there?” I asked.

She told me she would call as soon as she landed and that she’d call later with her hotel room number. They announced her boarding row. She shifted her bag on her shoulder and grinned.

“Really, I have to go. That’s me.”

I grabbed her one more time and hugged her, telling her I loved her and to be careful and to call me and to be safe. She squeezed back.

And then I let her go.

***

Listy McListerson

1. Thanksgiving was lovely, as was the turkey, despite what the husband says. And only because of the holiday did I relent and let him have a slice of tart (that sounds dirty).

2. Black Friday was lovely also, and I got a good head-start on Christmas shopping. Neither one of us was trampled or witnessed anyone being trampled, so I consider it a success.

3. I have a psychology final next Tuesday and then I'm done done done! with this semester. Amen.

4. I started a Twitter account last week. If possible, I think I suck harder at updating it than I do my blog.

5. Keely tagged me for a bookworm meme. She specifically said I couldn't use textbooks, but it really is the closest book to me, AND she really isn't the boss of me or the meme. So there. Rules state:

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 56.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next two to five sentences.
5. Don’t dig for your favorite book, the cool book or the intellectual one. Pick the Closest.
6. Tag five people to do the same.

Sooo...

"It is this system that allows the brain and spinal cord to communicate with the sensory systems of the eyes, ears, skin, and mouth and allows the brain and spinal cord to control the muscles and glands of the body. The PNS can be divided into two major systems, the somatic nervous system and the autonomic nervous system."

Tell me that isn't fascinating.

I'm tagging the husband, Elisa, and Melanie.

Listy McListerson

1. Just a friendly reminder, once again, to leave when a place of business closes. Please don't wait for me to walk into the lobby and jangle my door keys suggestively in your direction. It's just awkward for everyone.

2. I only have about six weeks left of school in this semester. It looks like I'll be winding up with a 4.0. Hot damn. We'll see how long it lasts.

3. Big D has had a 4.0 gpa since 1st grade. It runs in families!

4. How's about Tuesday night, huh? Could it be any more awesome than that? Was I the only one pinching myself all day yesterday to make sure I wasn't dreaming?

5. Did you know the day after Halloween all the fun-size Snickers, Butterfingers, and Skittles go on sale? Did you also know they go ahead and vomit Christmas all over the fucking aisles? Hello? I think we forgot about Thanksgiving.

And again with the lists

1. Remember when K moved to the middle of nowhere a few months ago? Well, due to some unfortunate events, she's moving again. And while the reason she's moving is kind of terrible, I'm so excited because she's moving 10-15 minutes away from me. Yay! I might actually get to see her more than twice a year now. Which is good because she just found out she's pregnant with number four. Our middle and youngest children are five weeks apart each, but I told her she has to go this one alone. I'm totally with her in spirit though, especially since I'll get to snuggle and smoosh a brand new baby in a few months.

2. I finished my 1500-word argument paper for English, and I took my psychology midterm last night, so I'm done for the week. It seems weird not to have anything to do or study or write, but I'm enjoying the week of rest.

3. This blog. Gah. I want so much to keep up with it better, but I'm having a hard time doing that. I don't even really have anything exciting going on to write about, but I feel like I should check in at least once a week.

4. This list is only going to have four things on it. Completely weird and even numbered, but I can't poop out anything else. I think I may go nap instead.

Listy McListerson

1. We're going to see Ben Folds tomorrow night. BEN FOLDS. That's really all I need to say.

2. The beauty of having a husband who is smart? He helps write your research papers. The beauty of online classes? That you can have your husband help write your research papers.

3. Can we just agree that petulant, whiny little bitch Kenley needs to go home already? Did you see the "hip-hop" ensemble she whipped up? She even had LL Cool J stuttering.

4. In the span of about two weeks, Boobers has had a black eye, a huge goose-egg on his head, rug burn on his nose and upper lip, and last night I was informed he somehow fell and bit his lower lip. He's our little prizefighter. Not a winning prizefighter, mind you, but still.

5. Perhaps the only good thing about fall is candy corn. And the best thing about candy corn is that I can only eat about five pieces (or two of those pumpkin ones) before I get a little gaggy. It's like they are their own portion control! Also, at my local Target, I found caramel and chocolate candy corn. Huzzah!

5b. "Huzzah" is a real word. I had no idea.

School is officially making me real tired

I have gobs of homework to do, we're out of clean spoons, and there is a very fine layer of dust on everything. There are also piles of laundry to wash, and they expect me to occasionally show up at work.

I called the husband Thursday morning and sobbed at him. I'm sure he was grateful I did it while he was at work instead of waiting for a more opportune time. But I couldn't help it. I was having a moment of frustration and was feeling SO overwhelmed. I didn't know what I wanted him to do. Just listen, I guess. And he did. And surprisingly, I felt a little better.

But I'm probably going to be scarce around here for a bit. Just until things calm down and it feels like I have control of the reigns again.

So possibly sometime in January.

I kid! I kid!

Soooo...

I promise this will be the last time I speak of $35 next-day shipping. Last time. For this semester at least. Promise.

I ordered my psychology book online on a Monday afternoon. After forking over money to receive it really, really fast, it was delivered Friday. That's four days.

I had to reorder a book for my first year seminar class. (The dude at the brick and mortar bookstore handed me the wrong book. That's a completely different ranty post.) I ordered the book through the same online store on Saturday afternoon. I used regular ground shipping. Want to know when it came? THREE DAYS LATER. I opened the box, not really believing it would be the book, but it was the book, delivered faster and cheaper than next-day shipping, and then my head exploded.

So that's it. I'm done with the fucking textbook-shipping talk.

***

In other news, I was sitting at the computer this morning while the babies melted their brains with some TV. Boobers was dancing around, giggling, when he decided to throw his blankie over his head, which completely covered his eyes, and run straight into the side of the computer desk. He hit so hard that he fell backwards.

He's fine. He doesn't even have a bump. But do you have any idea how hard it was to have to bite my lip and not laugh? His noggin is fine, but I have bloody tooth marks on my lower lip.

Listy McListerson

1. This blog, my friends, has finally come in handy. I compiled the posts of "How I met the husband" into one paper, tweaked it a little, and will be sending it in as my narrative rough draft for my English class. After it's peer-reviewed and tweaked some more, I'll send it in as my final draft. Score!

2. The husband dragged all three kids out to run errands so I could enjoy the peace and quiet and do some homework. I really do like him quite a bit. The dimples don't hurt either.

3. On a completely unrelated note, you really know it's time to shave when your fifteen-month-old starts petting your legs. Lovingly. Like they're, I don't know, a beloved dog.

4. Boobers has begun talking up a storm. His favorite thing to do is to point a chubby finger at anything and say, "Whadat?" When looking at pictures, it's, "Whodat?" I'm still not being called mama on a regular basis. His huge brown eyes framed with dark lashes is the only thing that saves him.

5. The husband just wandered through, saw that I was posting, and made some snide comment that I have three kids, work a part-time job, go to school, and yet still manage to post more to my blog than he does his. Like it's a contest or something. It's not. But if it were, I WOULD TOTALLY BE WINNING.

School's going great, thanks for asking

Soooo...this English composition class I'm taking? I have to write posts in the class blog. I was actually really pumped about it, because hey! Blog posts? I got 'em. But no, we're given a topic to blog about, which completely takes all the fun out of it.

So instead, I'll just be creative about it here. The first week's topic is, here we go, "If this class were a journey, what kind of journey do you want it to be?"

Sigh.

Complete cheesiness. And I had to write at least 250 words. It was HARD. I'll paraphrase what I actually wrote:

I like to write, blah, blah, but I kinda hate being confined to specific topics, blah, I wanna learn how to get through that, blah, blah, I love you guys, I'm gonna try real hard, BLAH.

Here's what I really wanted to write:

Um, this class? I'm taking it because I have to. I don't really want to. I think I write pretty well already, and from reading some of the other students' posts, I'm a damn genius. This isn't a journey, it's a damn prereq to classes I actually WANT to take. But I'll humor you, and if this class really were a journey, I'd hope it'd be the kind of journey that surprises me. Like, "Ooh, I think this trip might suck," but actually turn into, "Hey, that wasn't so bad. I guess. Whatever."

I'm not going to get this degree without offending several people, am I?

It's been a fun, fun day

But not really.

I started out this morning gathering up the babies for a trek to the campus bookstore. I claim temporary insanity. I circled and circled the parking lot, looking for a spot closer than sixteen blocks away to park in. Nothing. I wound up crying and calling the husband, prompting him to come home from work and meet me in the driveway when I got home, bookless.

I called my mom to come sit with the babies as the husband and I drove back to campus. The line to get into the store was wrapped around the building. Finally in the building, they only had two of my textbooks in stock. Thanks. I cried some more.

The husband and I drove to the next closest campus where we were informed that no, you can't buy books there for online courses, those have to be purchased online. NOT TRUE, DUMMY, but I scanned the shelves myself and determined that they didn't have the book either.

I wound up coming home and just ordering the damn book online. I paid $35 for expedited shipping.

Since I'm off work tonight, it's really my only time to get online and finish up what I can for the week. In the middle of posting my introduction for Psychology 101, the online format I'm using crashes and my access to everything is suddenly denied. ON THE FIRST DAY OF CLASSES. I cried a little bit more, slammed a few doors, shrieked at the husband profusely. He threw chocolate and soothing words at me.

I guess I should quit shrieking at the husband. He's been nothing but supportive in this adventure of mine. And I know for a fact he won't whine once if dinner's late, if he has to finish up a few loads of laundry for me, or if I need him to patiently explain integers one more time. He's a pretty terrific husband.

I'm going to finish up my chocolate, snuggle the husband for a minute, and try logging in to my classes one more time. If you hear cursing and general unpleasantness in the vicinity of Indianapolis, it means access was denied again, and my head is probably exploding. Duck.

Listy McListerson

1. I have three children. I can't even tell you how many times I've held my baby for some nurse to poke with a needle. Today, when the otherwise very sweet nurse stabbed my fifteen-month-old's chubby, dimpled thigh two times, I wanted scream velociraptor-style and then rip her head off. SHE MADE MY BABY CRY. Apparently it never gets easier.

2. While Boobers completely recovered and is just fine now, I still used him as an excuse to get out of something I didn't want to go to tonight. If you're going to feed, clothe, and rip people's heads off for your kids, the least they can do is give you an out for something once in a while.

3. I officially start school on Monday. I'm taking seven credit hours. I already know that I'll have to do a research paper for the English class I'm taking. I'm already overwhelmed and nervous that this will cut into my blogging time. Fucking higher education.

4. Oh, and school? I don't have books yet because I'm taking online classes and the damn online classes don't show up online until the very first day of school. Look, I like procrastination as much as the next gal, but not when I've invested several thousands of dollars on something. Speaking of, WHERE IS MY STUDENT LOAN?

5. This post right here makes my 94th post. That's only six away from 100! (I did the math for those who have trouble with it, like, uh, me.) I'm thinking I'm going to have a little contest to celebrate and to make all you lurkers delurk. So keep an eye out for it, and prepare to be dazzled by fabulous prizes! (Okay, a prize, and it probably won't be SUPER fabulous. But still.)

Purell, Post-its, and Kleenex, oh my

I tried to keep my excitement to a minimum, but I probably grinned way too big as I waved Big D off to second grade this morning. It helps that he was so ready to go back; hanging around the house with your little sister and brother is only so entertaining.

Do you see that backpack? It was stuffed with folders, crayons, and scissors. But that wasn't all. Big D also had to carry a separate bag filled with Other School Supplies that Annoy Kelly. OSSAK, as we will refer to them, include hand sanitizer, facial tissues, Post-its, baby wipes, and Ziploc bags.

Let's review. I pay taxes. People who don't even have children pay taxes. I pay $100 for "book rental." And on top of that, I have to send in freaking Kleenex.

Okay, fine. Kids are messy. I'm sure baby wipes come in handy at times. Come flu and cold season, I'll be grateful they're passing around the Purell. But Post-its? I was asked to send three packages of Post-its. Let's say there are 25 kids in Big D's class. That's 75 packages of Post-its. And there are usually three to four pads in a package. So that's...AN INORDINATE AMOUNT OF POST-ITS. While I try my best never to sound like a bitter old woman, I went to school for thirteen years and not only managed, but thrived without Post-its.

I'll hush, be glad I can afford it, and send in the OSSAK. But if I don't see some terrific project made entirely out of yellow sticky sheets of paper by the time this school year is over, I'm raising all sorts of hell.

Listy McListerson

1. Our new pillow-top, smooshy, comfy mattress was delivered yesterday. It's a lot taller than our old set, which will take some getting used to. Because lord help anyone who falls out of it.

2. You know what pisses me off? When you set out to bake a batch of cookies only to find that you have about a cup of flour and your damn recipe calls for 1 1/3 cups. NO BLACK AND WHITE COOKIES FOR YOU.

3. Also annoying, the fact that Smella loudly protests every day about taking a nap and then promptly falls asleep within five minutes. If it weren't so wildly inappropriate, I'd love to go in and wake her up just to tell her See? You were tired. I was right. AGAIN.

4. Big D goes back to school in nineteen days. You know what that means? One less scream-inducing kid during the day and SCHOOL SUPPLIES. If you see a woman in Target drooling over the notebooks and markers, it's probably me. Come say hi.

5. School starting also means book rental. From what I've gathered, book rental is an uncommon occurrence in the US. Apparently other states take these things called taxes and they cover your children's book/desk/paperclip usage at school. Huh. Neato. I much prefer shelling out $100. I'm sure that means Indiana kids' books are way better quality.

I isn't as big a dummy as I thought

I retook the math placement test this morning and passed! No remedial math for me!

Now I get to figure out when to take anatomy and physiology. Apparently it's a popular class and fills up quickly. The Saturday morning and late evening classes are filled. This does not jibe with my plan, people. (Spellcheck just caught that I spelled physiology wrong. Maybe it's a damn sign.)

In the meantime, I have to figure out how to carve a cake into the shape of a cowboy boot. Wish me luck and send cake decorating vibes.

I is dummy

Look. I've never been great at math. It all got a little hairy after pre-algebra. Plain old algebra was iffy. Geometry, calculus, trigonometry? CHA. Not happening. Now add that to the fact that I haven't really done any kind of that math in eleven years or so, and we've got a problem.

I took a college placement test this morning and wound up four points away from being able to take the college level math I need. DER. So I either take Math 050 or wait for two weeks, study my ass off, and retake the math portion of the placement test. Anyone have any good study sites for dumbdumbs?

I aced the reading and writing portions though. I even impressed my advisor. *curtsies* But you know she got to those math scores and was like, whoa. I have a total idiot savant on my hands.

I hope they like me!

I actually applied for community college the other day. Now I'm waiting to hear if I'm accepted. *snort* Since the hardest question was "Fill in your address" I think I have a pretty good shot! I'm really excited and kind of wished I'd done this years ago. But I look back at myself graduating high school, and wild horses couldn't have dragged me back to a school. I was so tired of it. I told myself I'd take a bit off and then go, but stuff happened, and then kids, and then a car payment or two, and a mortgage... I'm still not sure going back now is the best time either, but I'm afraid no time will be. And I really see myself as a L&D nurse. I know I'd be excellent at it. I couldn't say that when I was 18.

And I bet I get to buy school supplies. For myself. Pens and paper and notebooks and erasers and three-ring binders! *squeeee!*