What does Obama, aluminum foil, and the Heimlich Maneuver have in common?

I took two babies to vote in the Indiana primary today. Our precinct votes at a retirement home, so we were delayed several times for little old ladies telling Smella that they loved her pigtails and to pinch Boober's cheeks. Luckily, the babies took it in stride, I filled in the bubbles, fed the ballot machine, and finished my civic duty.

When we got home, I checked some email and picked up the house a little. Boobers wandered by, gnawing on a ball of aluminum foil that I'd put in the trash a bit before. Did I mention that Boobers is a Dumpster diver? He usually gets three squares plus a snack or two a day, but he apparently can't resist crumpled aluminum foil, bits of leftover breakfast and a slurp or two of Diet Coke left in a bottle.

So as he mosied by, I snatched the foil from him and removed the small piece he had ripped off from his mouth. Then I noticed that he was coughing and gagging, like he still had a piece in there. I scooped him up, checked his mouth again, and couldn't see anything. I sat him on my lap and patted his back a little, and he started really coughing and gagging. Checked again, and there was a little piece waaaay back in his throat. I knew better than to try to reach in there and get it, so I had that baby flipped upside down faster than you could blink while I pounded on his back. The small piece finally fell out, and I up righted him and calmed him down. He was rather upset by being flopped upside down and beat on a little.

I haven't been that scared since Big D tried to eat one of those black ant traps when he was about that age (Poison Control says there's not enough poison to hurt anyone in there). I'm still amazed with how in control I am when that kind of shit happens. Oh, I curse like a drunken sailor while it's happening, and I fall apart later, but in the moment I actually remember what to do without being hysterical. But also really helpful? Smella stood by the whole time this was going on asking, "Does he need a dwink? Does he need a dwink, mommy?"

Give your babies sloppy smooches and for thelovagawd, hide your foil balls, will ya?