Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The turkey should've totally been the national bird anyway

The husband is on thin ice, people. I always knew he was never fond of turkey (if that's even POSSIBLE), but to have him declare it publicly like that...woo. I don't even know, man.

I adore turkey the whole year, but Thanksgiving is like, the pinnacle of turkeydom. Yes, there were those few years of the pale, anemic, dry turkeys, but I've encouraged my mom change her roasting ways. Now our turkeys are toasty brown, crispy skinned, and oh so juicy. Meat falls off the bone and is perfectly seasoned. Not bland and boring as the husband insists.

I'm not even sure I can be with a man who thinks otherwise.

Besides, let's talk about mashed potatoes. When I merely suggested this year that we make another kind of potato dish rather than mashed, my family, including the husband, nearly rioted. I calmly offered up several other options...scalloped, roasted, casseroled...and was met with angry stares and the threat of looting. COME ON. We eat mashed fucking potatoes all. the. time. They're not even that tasty! They're simply a starchy vessel on which to eat cream and butter. We can actually eat cream and butter in better forms!

But whatever. All I know is that I will be bringing two homemade maple pecan tarts to my mother's for Thanksgiving. And I'm thinking that slices of tart will only be handed out to card-carrying turkey lovers who can convince me of their utter adoration of the bird.

Selfish? Weird? Obsessive? Maybe. But a marriage is at stake here.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm all for making the turkey the national bird. Then we wouldn't have to eat them anymore. Eagles probably taste better anyway.

Also, pfft.

Keely said...

Maybe selfish, weird, and obsessive, but also a pretty clever way of keeping more tart to yourself. Because THAT is what turkey dinners are actually all about - the DESSERT.

Kelly said...

Okay, I've got the tart covered, now help me figure out a way to keep him from the peanut butter cheesecake my sister is bringing!

Kelly said...

Also, when we post comments close together...the Keely/Kelly thing confuses me. lol

Miss Yvonne said...

I read your post and I thought hmmm I'm not sure about the turkey being the national bird because wouldn't it be lame to have a national bird that doesn't fly? And then I thought wait, is it the turkey that doesn't fly or am I thinking of the ostridge? And then I thought wait how do you spell ostridge? And then I realized I would need to apologize for this comment.

So yeah, sorry.

Go Turkey!

A said...

What are turkeys but giant chickens? :D I'm not quite fond of them myself, sorry... :D but I like turkey bacon, I hope that makes up for it... :D lol!

Amanda said...

Well, turkey can be dry, but I would say if we are making a list of preferred meats lamb would be the first to get booted.

Keely said...

Imagine if I'd had my childhood wish to change my name to Kelly, then??

 
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